AT&T

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AT&T

Me: Hello?
AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T...
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T...
Me: This is AT&T?
AT&T: Yes This is AT&T...
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: YES! This is AT&T, may I speak to Mr. Dement please?
Me: May I ask who is calling?
AT&T: This is AT&T.
Me: OK, hold on.

At this point I put the phone down for a solid 5 minutes thinking
that, surely, this person would have hung up the phone. I munched my sandwhich. Much
to my surprise, when I picked up the receiver, they were still waiting.

Me: Hello?
AT&T: Is this Mr. Dement?
Me: May I ask who is calling please?
AT&T: Yes this is AT&T...
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes this is AT&T...
Me: This is AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, is this Mr. Dement?
Me: Yes, is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes sir.
Me: The phone company?
AT&T: Yes sir.
Me: I thought you said this was AT&T.
AT&T: Yes sir, we are a phone company.
Me: I already have a phone.
AT&T: We aren't selling phones today Mr. Dement.
Me: Well whatever it is, I'm really not interested but thanks for
calling.

When you are not interested in something, I don't think you can
express yourself any plainer than by saying "I'm really not
interested",but this lady was persistent.

AT&T: Mr. Dement we would like to offer you 10 cents a minute, 24
hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.

Now, I am sure she meant she was offering a "rate" of 10 cents a
minute but she at no time used the word rate. I could clearly see that
it was time to whip out the trusty old calculator and do a little
ciphering.

Me: Now, that's 10 cents a minute 24 hours a day?
AT&T: (getting a little excited at this point by my interest) Yes
sir that's right! 24 hours a day!
Me: 7 days a week?
AT&T: That's right.
Me: 365 days a year?
AT&T: Yes sir.
Me: I am definitely interested in that! Wow!!! That's amazing!
AT&T: We think so!
Me: That's quite a sum of money!
AT&T: Yes sir, it's amazing how it adds up.
Me: OK, so will you send me checks weekly, monthly or just one big
one at the end of the year for the full $52,560, and if you send an
annual
check, can I get a cash advance?

AT&T: Excuse me?
Me: You know, the 10 cents a minute.
AT&T: What are you talking about?
Me: You said you'd give me 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days
a week, 365 days a year. That comes to $144 per day, $1,008 per week
and $52,560 per year. I'm just interested in knowing how you will be
making payment.

AT&T: Oh no sir I didn't mean we'd be paying you. You pay us 10
cents a minute.
Me: Wait a minute here!!! Didn't you say you'd give me 10 cents a
minute. Are you sure this is AT&T?
AT&T: Well, yes this is AT&T sir but......
Me: But nothing, how do you figure that by saying that you'll give
me 10 cents a minute that I'll give you 10 cents a minute? Is this
some kind of subliminal telemarketing scheme? I've read about things
like this in the Enquirer you know. Don't use your alien brainwashing
techniques on me.
AT&T: No sir we are offering 10 cents a minute for.....
Me: THERE YOU GO AGAIN! Can I speak to a supervisor please!
AT&T: Sir I don't think that is necessary.
Me: Sure! You say that now! What happens later?
AT&T: What?
Me: I insist on speaking to a supervisor!
AT&T: Yes Mr. Dement. Please hold.

So now AT&T has me on hold. I begin to
eat while I'm waiting for a supervisor. After a wait of a few minutes
and while I have a mouth full of food:

Supervisor: Mr. Dement?
Me: Yeth?
Supervisor: I understand you are not quite understanding our 10
cents a minute program.
Me: Id thish Ath Teeth & Teeth?
Supervisor: Yes sir, it sure is.

I had to swallow before I choked on my food. It was all I could do
to suppress my laughter and I had to be careful not to produce a
snort.

Me: No, actually I was just waiting for someone to get back to me so
that I could sign up for the plan.
Supervisor: OK, no problem, I'll transfer you back to the person who
was helping you.
Me: Thank you.

I was on hold once again and managed a few more mouthfuls. I needed
to end this conversation. Suddenly, there was an aggravated but polite
voice at the other end of the phone.

AT&T: Hello Mr. Dement, I understand that you are interested in
signing up for our plan?
Me: Do you have that friends and family thing because you can never
have enough friends and I'm an only child and I'd really like to have
a little brother...
AT&T: Click.


http://members.aol.com/acidzfetish/PA.gif
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Psý¢hø Ädd¡¢t

"I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things..
The glass is always half empty....and cracked..
And I just cut my lip on it... and chipped a tooth.."
 
RE: LOL, brilliant. (nt)

That was fun Good to have something to laugh at in a boring schol day.
 
These bastards are killing me. I'll have to try that one next time.




[img align=center" src="//redrival.com/aptyp/ftclogo-t.gif]
 
Thats a Classic :) (n/t)

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH
and remember.
BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING
 
i bow to you master

Man you are the best.
These guys are really annoying.Just last week i won five cell phones in a day.
I won the first one at work, actually they used the name of my predecessor. Declined it.
I won the second one at work again (with my name). Declined it.
Won the third one at home (with my name). Declined it halfway thru his speech.
Won the fouth one five minutes later by the name of my wife. by now i knew their speech better than they did, so i was saying his speech at the same time that he was saying it. when he stopped and asked me whati just said i reapeated his speech to him and asked him if he was interested. He laughed and asked me if i was interested. Click!
I won the fith one going to the gym. I work there too, so when the phone rang and i was the closest one i answered. As all the other calls he told me that i won a free cell phone, i told him send it to me without letting him finish his little speech. He told me no you have to sign up, i told him "you just told me that i won a cell phone, just send me the damn cell phone!" He replied that it would be useless without the sign-up plan. "i dont`t care i just want the phone".
It went on for about ten minutes and then he hung up I WON!

"I`m Ugly and i have five cell phones!"
 
Excuse me while I go change my shorts and wipe the tears of mirth from my face.That was killer dude!
Nekron
 
Hahaha, pretty funny, I'm surprised you pulled it off.

Usually I just say, "We're not interested" and slam the phone down hard so as to hurt the ears of the telemarketter.

Another fun thing to do is to have them fully explain the plan, the subplans the fine print, their office location, the route the line takes from the phone company to your house, the bill down to fractions of a cent, what discounts you get for suggesting the service to a friend, the internet access plans that can apply with it, the contracts available from three months to ten year plans, the line testing methods, and finally at the end of that two and a half-hour conversation where the telemarketter could have been making money from other calls, you tell them that you'll go get your father and see if he's interested. Then you repeat the process and eventually say you're not interested.

-Xotor-

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that would be great if you had 5 hours to spend, and a tape recorder.
 
Man, I was laughing for five minutes strait! I really gotta try that. Its a lot more fun than saying...no I dont want any of that, plus it gets them pissed off! double whammy!

-Silencer

"Your ride's over, mutie. Time to die." - Frank Horrigan
 
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