RPGs for the stupid

Ratty Sr.

Ratty Sr.

Ratty, except old
Moderator
Orderite
Alright, all of you clueless masses who lack understanding of RPG basics and have the nerve to place Fallout in the same basket with Baldur's Gate and Morrowind are about to receive a valuable lesson from your generous RPG expert Ratty. Here I submitted simple graphs, hand-drawn in Paint, that display game progression of certain popular RPG and "RPG" games in such a simple manner that even a complete retard could understand them. This means you, Bethesda and BioWare fans!

RPG_NWN.JPG


Neverwinter Nights, much like both Baldur's Gate games, is like an incredibly long and boring train ride. If you managed to replay this game, hats down to you. Maybe later you can show me your world's largest dental floss collection.

RPG_KOTOR.jpg


KotOR is like Neverwinter Nights with an amazing twist. Still a train ride, but with excitement near the end of the trip.

RPG_Fallout.jpg


Need I say more?

RPG_Arcanum.jpg


A screenshot from Arcanum should be in the dictionary next to the term "access violation".

RPG_Morrowind.jpg


If NWN and KotOR are train rides, Morrowind is a train wreck. If you managed to replay this game, hats down to you. Maybe later I can show you my shotgun.

RPG_Torment.JPG

If you still haven't reached the end of Planescape: Torment, you probably don't understand the main detail of this graph. When you do, you will feel like an idiot. Regrets won't be the only thing you will want to carve into skin.
 
You forgot the Baldur's Gate and Baldur's Gate II

Start, "Roleplay" (Character Creation), slug through a story that makes Gold Box look brilliant as most of the speech is poorly-crafted to the point where it's annoying, the end. :)

I might have to draw a path form for Bloodlines, and while it behaves in "linear" ways where you won't be able to go back into select locations after you have done certain events, or you might have to go off into a map for awhile and then leave (unable to return again), you can leave most things for later unless it might involve an item from one of those select locations.

This seems a bit more practical, as some locations would have been filled with a lot of police after that. You also wouldn't have reason to go to other areas until you are made aware of them, as the location really is immense and hence how Kindred hide so well. Yet, it still has the freedom of movement and acting feel that Fallout had.
 
SuAside said:
nice one ratty, although i really dont concur with the Arcanum bit
Click to expand...
I admit that one is a bit evil. The first time I played Arcanum I couldn't do some quests due to game-crashing bugs, so I just stopped playing. Later, when I wanted to return to Arcanum again, there were a lot of patches out already, so I patched the game and majority of bugs were gone (not all, but at least the game stopped crashing). I quit playing before reaching the end, but for different reasons.

Roshambo said:
You forgot the Baldur's Gate and Baldur's Gate II

Start, "Roleplay" (Character Creation), slug through a story that makes Gold Box look brilliant as most of the speech is poorly-crafted to the point where it's annoying, the end. :)
Click to expand...
Neverwinter Nights path pretty much applies to both Baldur's Gate games. I'll edit my post and mention that.

Now that the thread has been made a sticky, I'm almost ashamed of the crude manner in which I drew the images. Later I might redraw them with a more professional tool to make them prettier - if I'm not too lazy, that is.
 
You forgot Final Fantasy! I love Final Fantasy! Bestest RPahG's eva!

Mohrg :twisted:
 
Mohrg6sic6 said:
You forgot Final Fantasy! I love Final Fantasy! Bestest RPahG's eva!

Mohrg :twisted:
Click to expand...

Maybe this is just my opinion, but to me Final Fantasy 10 went something like this:
FF10.jpg
 
Mohrg6sic6 said:
You forgot Final Fantasy! I love Final Fantasy! Bestest RPahG's eva!

Mohrg :twisted:
Click to expand...
I`m sorry, but I couldn`t come up with a diagram derisive enough for such a shitty non-RPG.
 
I really loved the morrowind one, would only make a simple modification to arcanum according to my experiences: the end should just say "fuck it", stop branching and go straight to the end... I really stopped caring about doing side quests and reading the story right around the elven city...
 
Thats extremely unfair on Arcanum. Sure it crashes frueqently, but under the wash of bugs and glitches is a very good RPG that has made its way into my top 10.
 
meh...

the first time i played Arcanum through it crashed twice. no other gamestopping bugs encountered. twice in about 40 hours of play isn't that much i'd say... (that was before the patches btw)

either i was lucky or you guys are overreacting.
 
Well, that's what I thought until I played it a second time. Which was when the following happened:
After having spent about fifteen minutes on creating the perfect character, I got into the game for a minute before it crashed.
I then spent another ten minutes recreating the character, saved, and the game crashed.
I then loaded the save, and got into combat, when I realised how much being a mage really sucked with the fatigue, and I started over.
Then I created a new character, and after three minutes it crashed.
In total it took me two goddamn hours to get past the first area. That was when I gave up. And when I started wondering why this was the first time I'd encountered that many crashes.

Here's Vampire: Bloodlines:
vtmb.jpg
 
Arcanum has never ever crashed on me.
Seriously.
I think you people just have lousy computers//don't know shit about installing games/patches.
Pf.

Nice diagrams, though. Simple, but effective.
 
alec said:
Arcanum has never ever crashed on me.
Seriously.
I think you people just have lousy computers//don't know shit about installing games/patches.
Click to expand...
Or maybe your setup is one of several dozen in the world that runs Arcanum perfectly.
 
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